0:01: Have the Tony Wood Hair logo over the first speedramped time lapse of the salon floor, rather than over black — this will give it a chance to breathe and make it feel more tied to what’s being shown behind it. Setting the scene within the first three seconds is essential for social media videos!
0:10 — 0:15: A couple of the cuts don’t quite align with the beat of the music — if they could be adjusted just a little bit to kiss the rhythm perfectly, that’d be awesome! Love the idea of the bell ring. It’s used twice, and that feels a touch redundant — is there an alternative shot that could be used, perhaps the scissors closing on the hair?
0:05 — 0:20: All of the shots are absolutely majestic and perfect, but could the order be reconsidered? If the clocktower exteriors came before the first bell ring and then we dove into the salon action, that would help to set the scene a little bit better. Putting the clocktower in people’s minds from the get-go will help them envision where all of the salon action is happening from the outset. Hopping in, then out, then back in again might be confusing for some viewers.
0:27: I don’t think the text overlays on the video work too well — the visuals and cinematography are so strong, and the song is so perfectly matched with the vibe of the video, but bridging the two with lyrical typography gives too much power to the song, if you know what I mean?
We want viewers to consciously focus on the video and subconsciously focus on the song, and the lyrical overlays make people consciously focus on the song a little too much. Also, consider context: this video will likely primarily be used on screens at events and shows, where the text might be a little challenging to see if it’s not a main focus.
Aligning Elise’s smile with the ‘Ha!’ is perfect, though!
0:31: up until now, the cuts have all been straight — here, some fades/dissolves start creeping in. Is there a purpose for this? Could all cuts be straight to keep things consistent and hard-hitting?
0:35: Not sure what’s happening in this shot — is it a reversed clip? I think drop this moment entirely, especially as it’s placed quite jarringly between some really stunning slow-mo shots of Elsie’s hair. Great attempt at switching things up, but I think keep things flowing by removing this shot.
0:42: Are there any slow-mo shots of Color Factory signage or logos or branding of any kind (Color Factory, as in, the downstairs space)? I think a whip-pan transition (where the cut begins and ends with the camera in lateral motion) to a Color Factory logo followed by another whip-pan to the stunning sequence of Color Factory shots would be better than the spin transition here.
Some sort of visual reference to the fact that the video is entering a different space, to avoid confusion. A speedramped shot from the top of the stairs angling from the salon floor to downstairs would be ideal!
0:46: Not sure if this is massively important but showing a past employee’s name might be a risky move for future-proofing? If this clip could be cut so that ‘Lydia’s name isn’t shown, that’d be ideal. Not too big of a thing, though!
All of the shots between 0:40 and 1:05 are majestic!
1:11: A slow-mo shot of someone looking badass instead of a fade to black would be better here, I feel, lest people might assume it’s the end of the video and scroll onto something else as soon as the black screen comes in.
1:13: For all whip-pans, could some directional blurring be applied to better mask the cuts between clips? This is definitely not a huge priority, though, as only other filmmakers who are looking for these sorts of things will likely notice.
1:14: There’s some strobe flickering/banding in this shot of Laura, could it be repaired? It might not look too distracting on our smaller screens but when shown at industry events via slightly older projectors with weaker lumen counts, the banding will be much more visible. Not one of the most pressing issues for the video, but if the frame rate the footage was shot at makes a repair easy, that’d be ace!
1:17: I want to award medals to whoever framed this shot!
1:23: That little sequence of very short cuts, could a couple of those be brought out to replace some other shots (such as the reversed shot at 0:35)? They look beautiful, and the scissors in some of them would be great to get in a little earlier, to reinforce the cutting elements of the TWH offering before the dive down to the Color Factory.
They can remain here if their duplication isn’t too distracting, because they work amazingly!
1:28: Love the double exposure idea of the lights teasing through — I think it’d be even better if it was:
Double Exposure (Clip A and Clip B)
At the moment, there’s a straight cut to a double exposure with Clip B popping in, but then a fade transition to the fully-opaque Clip B. A cut followed by a fade is inconsistent, so if we could get the transitions matched up, that’d be brilliant!
1:38: I think the color flickering worked for the Color Factory but not for upstairs, where I think the idea of ‘crazy’ should be mainly represented in camera movement/cut speed. Speedramping could work if there’s not enough video coverage.
1:42: More visual lyrical cues to remove, flickering/strobing/banding to fix if possible, etc.
1:52: Teasing a fade to another shot but not committing feels off, but the fades (rather than the straight cuts) work really well here, if the fades are full and flowing cleanly!
2:00 onwards: There are some key shots in here (a closing clocktower time-lapse, product shots, a doggo, awards, salon partners, etc.) but a lot of the shots also feel a bit like afterthoughts that have been included to stretch the video length to match the song length.
As this last stretch of the backing track is mostly repeated, could the middle few ‘it’s about to get crazy’s be snipped, so the song’s natural finish comes sooner? Cutting the video to under 2:20 will be essential for most platforms (especially Twitter), so that’s a good target to hit!
Cutting out 15-ish seconds would be perfect. Keep in all the important shots (products, awards, doggo, etc.).